‘A flower does not think of competing to the flower next to it. It just blooms.’ – Zen Shin
As my 39th birthday has come and gone, I reflect on my life, my family, my team. I received this message from my team and it knocked my socks off. And I thought, “Really? Am I really all of this?”
Happy Birthday to our fearless leader, Dr. Tiffany! We’d follow you anywhere – especially if there is cake. Is there cake?!? No, seriously, thank you for blazing the trail and allowing us all to be a part of this massive vision you have. We are blessed to be a part of your team and your life.
your ROCKSTAR team
As I reflect back…I wasn’t always fearless, but many times filled with doubt. I wasn’t always the trailblazer, but a follower. I wasn’t always a visionary as I thought my dreams were too big, too far-fetched. I wanted to be the leader of the pack but was scared of the responsibility, so instead I hid and maybe pointed a finger or two. And then, about 5 years ago, I had the courage to pull out a mirror, to look at myself in all of my beauty, strength, courage…yet chaos, imbalance and ego…and see WHO I AM.
It was just a decision.
And when I was called step onto the trail that needed to be blazed, I faked it until I made it. Every day, many times a day. When I was uncomfortable, I walked through it knowing that growth only happens outside of our comfort zone. When I wondered if I was on the right track, I felt into it. Did I lean in or lean away? When I was on the ‘wrong track’ (really, there’s no such thing, just another piece of the journey) I slightly changed directions. And because I’m kind of intense J and take things to the edge of the cliff, people saw me as confident and certain (sometimes even cocky), but sometimes it actually was weakness, vulnerability and insecurity. I had this perceived notion that trailblazers, leaders and risk takers were perfect, that they never messed up and always behaved professionally.
There I go again paying more attention to how others show up instead of me.
Once I decided to fully accept my mission and vision, blaze the freaking trail, build my kick-ass tribe and know that I’m enough, my life changed. The lens that I looked through changed. And now what I see is still filled with millions of colorful, shiny balls but they are serving a purpose greater than I imagined.
So I will trust.
For my team, I write this to thank YOU for following the “fearless” even though you wanted safety. For following the trailblazer when even you really didn’t want to get “dirty”. For trusting my “unconventional risky decisions” when you thought we were doing good enough. It’s not for everyone…
For my family, I write this to thank YOU for patience as my risks have sometimes been uncalculated. For stability as I chase some really fun, colorful shiny balls. And for never-ending love, support and encouragement that I AM on the right path.
And about this life I was chosen for…I accept the responsibility for being the trailblazer in our community and as a healer; I accept light so I can continue to shine and use the gifts that I’ve been given; I accept love to realize my own worth when doubt creeps in; I accept certainty to know that no matter what life throws my way, we will be ok; and I accept me as me. Even in the days of wonder, the days of sadness and the days of grief.
So, yes, I am fearless. I am a trailblazer. I am an extreme visionary. I’m intense, a risk-taker, a changemaker. I’m a wife, mom, daughter, sister, aunt, friend and healer. And I will strive to be the flower that just blooms, no matter what is going on around me. I hope you do, too.
Here’s to another kick-ass year…